I identify with a number of the responses above, including your own, but I respond most strongly to pantshead's. I think that she's right, in spite of the fact that certain facts in my life were determined for me at an early stage, against my or anyone's will.

I share your sense of bewilderment at how convoluted and random our paths seem; luck has also certainly played a part in my career (my current church job arrived starting with a discussion with a stranger on an airplane). Yet the choices that I made, when I consider them, seem incontrovertible when it comes to big questions: I couldn't have chosen any other way, in the end. When it comes down to details, there are lots of questions, but I'm not always convinced how far the outcome would change based solely on those.

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